Looking to rehome my child- free to a good home

Due to life-changing events, we are unable to care for our now older child.  We just don't have enough time to give him the attention he deserves. We are moving to a new residence that does not allow children to play outside and visible. We are afraid of how he may react to the new baby in the family.  He comes with his own food and water dishes, his toys and his bedroll. He is housebroken and follows most commands. He's papered and is up-to-date on all his shots. He answers to the name Nick but you can rename him. Free to a good home!

  Sure it's satire, but this is how dog people see you when you rehome your "old pets!" Knock it off!